30 Day Challenge – Day 2: A Letter to a Dinosaur

Dear Lord Dinosaur,
First off I would like to apologize for the tardiness of my letter to you, I know you expected it a few days ago. I’ve been confined to my bed in the throes of illness, but for the moment I feel well enough to type out some words to you. Do you know what it’s like to be sick? In Jurassic Park some members of your species are shown being sick, including a sneezing cold! Is it accurate?

Anyway…

I’m a big fan. Not, you know, as big as you, but a biiiig fan.

I don’t honestly remember when this happened, so it must have been fairly early in my childhood. I remember almost the exact moment that I became engrossed with astronomy but I believe my passion for your kind entered my life even earlier. If I had to guess I think my fascination began as I read about a tiny prehistoric horse, the Eohippus which I knew it as, or Hyracotherium which is the actual scientific name. While not a dinosaur, I can vividly recall being extremely fascinated looking at drawings of this tiny animal and imagining how it evolved into the modern horse. From there I was sold on paleontology.

Artist’s rendition of the tiny pre-historic horse, Eohippus.

And, of course, the animated film Land Before Time had so much to do with it as well. Crying along with poor orphaned Littlefoot and staring wide-eyed at the beautifully rendered pre-historic landscapes all made me hungry to know about these animals. I quickly learned that the reality for dinosaurs wasn’t quite as cute and colorful as most of the cartoon tried to convince us but a lot more like the first few minutes of the film with loss and solitude and a harsh environment.

So much of the beauty I find in the entirety of your complex and vast species, Lord Dinosaur, is in your perseverance. While the K-T extinction event might have knocked out most of you and shattered your diversity, you’re still here! And that, my Lord, is why I’m still in awe of you today. Whenever I see a new article discussing a new find or theory of evolution, I throw myself at it with the same childlike glee as ever.

Your loyal fan,

Karen

30 Day Challenge – Day 1: A letter to an inanimate object that I hate – Henry the Hoover

Dear Henry d’Hoover,

You’re only a hoover (or a vacuum cleaner but you’re British, so I will stick with hoover) and yet you can make me so angry that I want to explode. Or make you explode. You might remember that time that I yelled and kicked you? It was my secret hope that you would cease to exist in that moment. But you didn’t. Maybe you want me to apologize – I did kick you. I have to say, you can stop waiting, because that isn’t going to happen. You brought it on yourself, Henry, by being a little prick.

Why, Henry? I actually liked you at first! I thought you had such a sweet little smile and cooky eyes that you must be fun to have around. Oh, how wrong a person can be. I know now that your smile isn’t sweet at all but a smug smirk you wear in anticipation of my rage. You know exactly when and how to anger me most, whether it’s by dropping a tube as I’m cramping to reach under a bed or by tripping over your own GODDAMN cord AGAIN.

I mean, really, Henry. It’s an appendix and it’s attached to you, surely you should be able to hump along without falling and rolling over on your side at the very sight of the cord in front of you. It shouldn’t be necessary! I’m almost positive you do it because you’re either lazy or cruel. Or both. And then you dare SMILE UP AT ME and expect me to put you up right, only so you can do it again 10 minutes later.

 

Behold and remember the face of a psycopath. They may look sweet and innocent, but that little smile is a warning. You would be wise to heed it.

 

And why, Henry, why can’t you keep yourself together? Falling apart at the most inopportune moments… It’s like you can just release your limbs at will. Surely it can’t give you that much pleasure to force me to bend over and pick you up and stick you back together countless times every day?

I know we need to maintain a professional relationship you and I, but you’re not making it easy for me here. You’re a sadistic, evil bastard. I can only hope that this letter makes you think twice about the path you’ve chosen and find it in your heart to be a little kinder to the rest of us.

Sincerely,

Your enemy co-worker.

A (new) 30 Day Challenge!

One that I’ll possibly actually do this time, maybe sort of hopefully.

A few days ago my good friend Intermittante posted on her blog about one of these (in)famous 30 Day Challenges that she had found. Every day you write a letter to an imaginary subject – each day has a different subject and theme. She debated whether or not it was something to do and I said if she’d do it, I’d do it to.

Today she posted her first Challenge – Letter to an inanimate object I hate, so I suppose it’s my turn. I’m not 100% sure I will have the time to do it within a reasonable timeframe today, but it WILL happen!

It’s actually a fun and creative project intended to get you writing. Image

30 days of writing, sound familiar to anyone? If I could do it in November, surely I can do it now.

Have faith.

 

 

Edit: It might be useful to myself and others who might want to try this out to put the list of topics for the 30 days on here. Better late than never, right? ;)

 

day 1. A letter to an inanimate object you hate.
day 2. A letter to a dinosaur.
day 3. A letter to a movie character
day 4. A letter to someone you want to kick in the face expressing why you want to kick them in the face
day 5. A letter to a celebrity you want to kick in the face
day 6. A HEARTFELT letter to some food
day 7. A letter to a historical event
day 8. A letter to a giant space robot
day 9. A letter to the coolest person you’ve never met
day 10. A letter to an alien race.
day 11. A letter to your last bowel movement
day 12. A letter to a mythological creature
day 13. A letter to a word you don’t like
day 14. A letter to a word you love
day 15. A letter to your crotch.
day 16. A letter to your bed
day 17. A letter to a video game character
day 18. A letter to a website that ruined your life
day 19. A letter to an animal you like
day 20. A letter to an animal you think is fucking stupid
day 21. A letter to something you’ve owned for 5 years+
day 22. A letter to something you want to fuck
day 23. A letter to the drug of your choice.
day 24. A letter to one of your body parts
day 25. A letter to Gary Busey
day 26. A letter to the future cyborg version of you
day 27. A letter to band that really needs to break up
day 28. A letter to a movie you hate
day 29. A letter to a letter you’ve written
day 30. A letter to a bowl of fruit